Half of a tenth of a thousand things that you want to know about me
- What is your middle name? I have two of them. David and Paul, in that order.
- What size is your bed? Queen. You know - like Elizabeth.
- What are you listening to right now? The ambient sounds of my apartment, combined with an episode of the Simpsons I've seen 20 kagillion times.
- Last 2 digits in your cell phone number? 67 (damn... two away!)
- What was the last thing you ate? Burritos filled with meat that was actually made of soy.
- Last person you hugged? Ashley
- How is the weather right now? It's fucking after 1:13 in the AM here - It's dark. That's what it is here.
- Last person you talked to on the phone? Emmi, who called to see just how drunk I was while I was driving. Flash - I wasn't.
- The 1st thing you notice about the opposite sex? Skin color. Nothing turns me on more than non-white girls - girls with darker skin, dark hair, dark eyes. They're so fucking beautiful.
- Do you want children? Yes, I do. I want to have a family more that anything. I'm ready to be a good dad, and a good husband. And also, it'll help with taxes.
- Ever get so drunk you don't remember the entire night? Well, not the entire night, but most of the nights, yeah. Unfortunately, I still remember that fateful ride to Milwaukee with Fuzzy one night, - shortly after I fell down crying in a graveyard.
- Hair color? Faded Black, which looks grey. This will end soon.
- Job? I'm a Software Design Engineer in Test for ... a company you've heard of.
- Biggest fantasy? Wealth beyond my wildest dreams.
- Eye color? A deep, dark lose-yourself-in-it-blue.
- Does the person you like-like you back? What is this? Third grade?
- Favorite holiday? St. Patrick's Day
- Favorite season? Summer. Because girls wear less then.
- Ever cried for no reason? Sort of. I've cried when I'm drunk. I've cried when watching the 9/11 DVD. and I've cried when garth brooks sings some of his shit.
- Last movie you watched? Firefly DVDs.
- How many mirrors are in your room? 1.
- Do you know any Fall Out Boy songs? No. I'm not sure what you mean, but I swear that I hate you.
- Have you ever decapitated a Barbie doll? Only with a soldering iron.
- Do you enjoy Starbucks? I live in Seattle. No. No I don't.
- Does the word "horcrux" mean anything to you? That would be the entire reasoning behind having a whore, right?
- Do you have any friends of the gay preference? Maybe. We haven't gotten around to blowing eachother quite yet.
- Do you think Jesus is great? I think he's a fucking has-been who's still looking to score some drugs and chick off of his friends. I mean, look. Jesus is fucking awesome at Megaman, but that fucker won't stop drinking. Next time his ass passes out, we're just gonna drop him at emergency care. Fuck him, man. I'm jewish.
- Is cheese like the best food ever, or what? Possibly.
- What book are you reading? "A Short History of Nearly Everything" by Bill Bryson. So Suck it.
- Piercings? right eyebrow. Oh, and all the metal in my penis as well.
- Favorite movie? I don't even need to change these answers - awesome. I like Pulp Fiction, Fight Club, Shawn of the Dead, The Shawshank Redemption, and Moulin Rouge an awful lot. My comfort movie right now is Lost in Translation. I dunno. Take your pick.
- Favorite college football team? The Allstar Fuckasses.
- What were you doing before filling this out? I took my sleeping pill.
- Any pets? Just my penis.
- Dogs or cats? Dogs are better than Ezra.
- Favorite flower? Your younger sister's genitals.
- Have you ever been caught doing something you weren't supposed to? Yea..
- Have you ever loved someone? Yes.
- Who would you like to see right now? Jesus. That way he could tell me some jokes, and I could kick him in the junk.
- Are you still friends with your exes? Uh huh.
- Have you ever fired a gun? Hells yes, whatever that means.
- Do you like to travel by plane? Except for having to talk to other people, yeah, it's fine.
- Right or left-handed? Right. Like all the other normal people in the world.
- If you could be with anyone right now who would it be? Ashlee Simpson.
- How many pillows do you sleep with? Four.
- Are you missing someone right now? Just my lord and savior Binky the Clown.
- Do you have a tattoo? No. Ink on the skin is a sin with my kin. That's not actually true, but it rhymes, and I like it.
- Do you still watch cartoons on Saturday morning? I'm hardly ever awake on Saturday morning.
- Are you hiding something from someone you like? No doubt
- When is your birthday? September 6th, 1980